第二十九章开封忧伤之长夜未央人未眠(1 / 4)
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夜的漆黑中我们相峙立着
在寒冷中,凝成玻璃的影子。
死还遥远,生却迷茫
什么生死相许,不过是你我
游戏时的一句玩笑
有时候不得不承认,认识一个朋友是很偶然很戏剧化的事情。譬如后来我将我在火车上遇上周扬的事情讲给一个很铁的哥们听时,他表示太难以置信。他有充分的理由。他说,周扬是那样一个富家子弟,纵使他打翻你的骨灰盒也没有必要对你这么关心啊。他为什么非要送你回家,为什么在女友演出时在剧院门口等你三四个小时,我想不通,你不会告诉我是因为他善良吧。
其实莫说他,就连我自己也不知道,他为什么会对我这么一个陌生人这么费神。只是我们莫名其妙地就认识了,而且成了一见如故的哥们儿。在大相国寺借宿的那晚,当他知道我也在相国寺时,他便央求了主管夜律的戒律僧打开偏门,从香客房直穿过廊,往我居住的后禅院而来。雪片纷纷,在门外坠落。
当我看见他的那一刻,哑然失笑。他周身上下给一床厚毛毯裹个严严实实,只留一双黑亮的眼睛骨碌碌乱转,脸上的表情一点也看不到。他身后跟着那个个子高高的男孩雷子。
雷子脸庞黑黑的,却看上去很真挚。
雷子替周扬揭去毛毯,抖了抖上面的雪。周扬一张脸因为高烧而呈现一种胭脂红。他激动地鼻翼鼓鼓的。
玉宁哥,他叫。
我笑了:你乱叫什么啊,谁是你哥,你小子见谁都这么滥情啊!
他孩子似急得说不出话来,我看见雷子有点恼怒的样子,便对拉住周扬的手让他坐到我身边:干嘛当真,跟你开玩笑呢!
他却又孩子似地咧嘴笑了。
那一夜,我们围坐在秋明的矮榻上,每人披了一条被褥说了一夜的闲话,一直到天亮。
就这样,大年初一的夜,我们在晨钟暮鼓的大相国寺度过。当东方的黎明映出寺院屋顶的鸱角和骑凤仙人的轮廓时,周扬才坐着睡着了。雷子又用那条毛毯把他裹了,轻轻抱起来回去了,像抱一个婴儿那么认真。
经过半夜的长谈我发现,雷子人是很不的,只是对周扬太用心了,总怕他受到别人的伤害,他恨不能生出一双翅膀来严严密密地盖住他。他几乎对周扬身边的任何一个人提防。当然对我也不例外。
初二,杜叔接我回去时,和杜叔一起去空慧禅师的禅房和他道别。我却不敢再抬头看他。这和昨天初见他时的感觉甚是不同。我永远不会忘记他昨天告诉我的那个关于妈妈的秘密,使得我既恨他又不愿意恨他。因为我不相信那是真的,一旦我恨他就说明我已经承认了他说的是事实。我不相信,我逼迫自己不去恨他。
我问他亚宁的骨灰要怎么安置。他淡淡说今早做晨课时一个黑黑的男孩子问过同样的问题了。我知道那应该是雷子代周扬来问的。原来他们说的资深的法师就是空慧。
空慧脸上的肥肉动了动,淡淡地说:人之生死序,灵魂或堕入三道或上达至境,肉体不过是一具空壳罢了。亚宁要骨灰撒在黄河滩,将自己归于虚固然好,但对于人之常情还是走常规的路子吧。亚宁是个罪孽深重的孩子,若不及时超度必堕入永不轮回的饿鬼道,我会为他念一个月的《光明经超度。至于骨灰的事情,还是让他睡在你父母的身边吧。